Venky's ruminations ….

Bringing a unique Global Perspective to various issues based on my life experience

Archive for category Letters

Letter to my alienated daughter #9

Apr 23

Posted by Venky Venkatraman in Letters | No Comments

My loving faithful daughter apologizes to her elementary school staff for speaking the truth…

Dear Sakshi,

in December 2012 you made a fateful video that brought your video producing “career” to an abrupt end.  Below is the video she posted on Youtube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B-wbwR209Pk&feature=youtu.be

But oops – there is no video – because it got “censored”.  And why did that happen?  In that video (posted in a Youtube account controlled by your mother), you had depicted one of your elementary school teachers (without naming either school or teachers) as crazy enough to have mood swings and verbally abuse the children and another teacher putting her feet on the children and twisting their arms during PE class.

You caved in to the pressure (despite my total support, telling you to stand your ground) and wrote a letter of apology to all and sundry (see your apology email and my email to you about it above) and the video was taken down.  And, as I feared, you did not make another video – and you budding video “career” came to an abrupt end.

Now you are in journalism school and the Chief-Editor of your college newspaper. I know you get pressures from all quarters from people who have a problem with what you publish or don’t publish in your paper. And it does appear that you are standing up well to those trying to twist your arm.

It does seem to me that you learned your lesson from what transpired with the video and that you do NOT have to apologize for speaking the truth to power.

And I believe, whether you acknowledge it or not, that I contributed to you growing a spine since the fiasco with the self-censored YouTube video so that you no longer cave in to pressure. In the process whether or like it or not, people who know both of us see you as a piece of the old block!

Hopefully, one day, your eyes will open and you will be able to see from where you got the qualities that make you so successful today.

Best wishes.

Venky Venkatraman
B.Tech, MBA, JD

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Letter to my alienated daughter #8

Apr 9

Posted by Venky Venkatraman in Letters, Uncategorized | No Comments

I bought this house in 2002 because my loving faithful daughter told me when we were moving from CA to TX that she wanted an upstairs-downstairs house!

I bought this house in 2002 because my loving faithful daughter told me when we were moving from CA to TX that she wanted an upstairs-downstairs house!

Dear Sakshi,

In 2001, when you were just 3 years old, and I had decided to move from California to Texas to take up a new job, you said “Dad – my friend here has an upstairs-downstairs house. I want to also have an upstairs-downstairs house. Can you get me one?”.

Since I could refuse you nothing from the time you were first born and looked at me with your beautiful brown eyes, I immediately said “Of course, I will get you one konthey (baby)”.

So I told the realtors in Dallas not to bother to even show me any house that did not have “upstairs-downstairs”. Eventually, I zeroed in on this house with 2 stories.

At least from my end, I have some very fond memories (bolstered by thousands of pictures and hundreds of hours of video) of you and your sister growing up in this house. So it was really painful to me (and it still pains me till today) when you made it appear during your testimony in court that nothing good ever happened to you when you were with me in this house. (A more competent lawyer would have torn your testimony apart for being so extreme and absolute in your statements but that is another story).

Under the circumstances, I can be reconciled with the fact that you and I may never have a relationship again and move on with my life ONLY when I am able to find out what is the rationale based on which you have completely rejected me.

Per Dr. Richard Warshak an authority on Parental Alienation regarding a parent who alienates a child from another parent:

“Through persistent bad-mouthing, lies, exaggerations, overlooking positives, and drum-beating negatives, they manipulate their children to reject the other parent in the same way a politician paints a unfavorable picture to alienate voters from the opponent.”

At this time, I believe your mother engaged in this type of behavior. As long as I believe that is what happened to you, you can rest assured that your mother will pay a steep price for destroying your relationship with me. On the other hand, if it is some other reason that has ripped us apart, it might be in the best interest of everyone involved that you let me know what exactly happened (from your perspective) that turned my “loving faithful daughter” into somebody I cannot recognize anymore.

I assure you that I will leave no stone unturned to figure out what happened to the girl who used to be the apple of my eye and the light of my life, however long it takes.

Hopefully, one day, sooner rather than later, you will let me know “What happened?” and bring an end to this quest.

Best wishes.

Venky Venkatraman
B.Tech, MBA, JD



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Letter to my alienated daughter #6

Mar 31

Posted by Venky Venkatraman in Letters | No Comments

Once upon a time my loving faithful daughter used to apologize when she made a mistake!

Dear Sakshi,

Couple of days ago, I read this article in your paper about the movie made on the terrorist attack on the Taj Hotel in Bombay https://nyunews.com/arts/film/2019/03/25/anupam-kher-hotel-mumbai-dev-patel-bollywood-armie-hammer/

Brought me back memories of the visit that we made to this hotel the year after this attack and the fact that we had a meal at one of the hotel’s restaurants.  You might remember that they had preserved some signs of the attack as a memorial.

I believe that the places that I took you along as a child helped in developing the person that you are today.  My goal then was that you should have a global outlook, knowing about things outside of your little world in Coppell.

If you are able to get out of the fog of alienation that appears to cloud your thinking nowadays, you should be able to see that your father played at least some part (besides giving you your genes!) in getting you where you are today.

Maybe the day will come one day when “your eyes will be opened” to that fact.

Best wishes.

Venky Venkatraman
B.Tech, MBA, JD

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